Recently there have been a few of the blogs I follow talking about honesty and being real. So I figured I'd share the life lesson I got today on being real and what it means to me. It is about ALLOWING ourselves as mothers to BE real. Real people. Real humans.
Real means, by definition; True and actual; not imaginary, alleged, or ideal, Free of pretense, falsehood, or affectation, Genuine and authentic; not artificial or spurious, in other words to NOT be perfect. It isn't just about a house that gets messy or food that isn't perfect, or in my case, hardly ever on the table these days, its about how we raise our families, how we treat our spouses, and how we live life in general.
Oftentimes we percieve real as what we want our house/family/life/body/image/insert your word here; to look like. We have a picture in our head, a very pretty picture of how things are supposed to go. And when the control is taken from us, we just insert "picture" real, for "life" real.
Let me tell you a bit about real...
Stress...it's real
Perfect...it's not
guilt...it's real
a spotless house..it's not
frustration...it's real
calm cool and collected...it's not
screaming at your child(ren) when you didn't mean to...it's real
perfect children...it's not
happy children...it's real
perfect mother...it's not
a mothers love...it's real
As a mother we are expected to do so much, to be so many things. And we want to proudly wear those hats. Sometimes, just sometimes, those pressures, whether put on us by ourselves, society, family, or friends take their toll on our well being. And sometimes they can result in a mother doing or saying something she isn't proud of.
Are you starting to see the underlying theme of this lesson? You guessed it. *Sigh* Worlds worst mom confession; I yelled at the lil princesses today. I mean really really yelled. I shouldn't have. I'm not proud, at all. As a matter of a fact, that REAL guilt? I have a lot of it. The thing I have in my corner? They are children. They have faith and love like a child. They see the world, their mother, through their eyes, not those of an adult who can hold a grudge. There is a reason God called us to be like the little child. Whoever then humbles himself as this child, he is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Matthew 18:4 They have so much to give. And in that, forgiveness. Unconditional forgiveness. I asked for it, I received it, and I accepted it.
AH-HEM now listen to this...you need to hear me, yes I'm talking to you!
I am here to tell you that it is ok. It is ok to have yelled at them louder than you meant. Ok to have hurt their feelings. Am I saying do this anytime you like? NO WAY girlie, don't even think about it, I am however suggesting, you are human. God did not create you perfect. He did not intend for you to be perfect. So why are you trying? Instead, try to be the person, the mother, the sister, the daughter, the wife, and the friend that He intended for you to be. A human, imperfect, mistake making, messy hair, sweats wearing, children grime displaying, all around REAL person.
Go ahead. Let yourself. It's refreshing! I finally did and look at the results!
Everything from the day faded away as my wonderful family gathered on a picnic blanket outside our house tonight to have some Chick Fil A. (which by the way is soso yummy if you have never had it!) After that instead of picking up and heading in on routine, we tossed, no, threw it out the window. And what a treat! The giggles resounded all around the circle, the smiles lit up the evening sky and the memories they will last forever.
And that my dear reader friends is what truly matters.
And that my dear reader friends is what truly matters.